{"product_id":"im-only-talking-to-my-dog-today-tote","title":"I'm Only Talking to My Dog Today Tote","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSome days, that's the only honest answer.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eI'm only talking to my dog today\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA bag for the introvert mornings - when the coffee queue feels like too much and the dog is, frankly, better company. Embroidered in clean, confident lettering on heavyweight canvas, so the message reads without anyone having to ask.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWorn well in: Sunday markets, morning beach strolls, the line at Customs, anywhere you'd rather not chat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEmbroidered in New Zealand · Heavyweight 100% cotton canvas · Shipping NZ-wide\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhy you'll wear it\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eFunctional and funny.\u003c\/strong\u003e Does what a tote should do - and warns people off before you've finished your flat white.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eThe introvert flex.\u003c\/strong\u003e People who get it will smile. People who don't won't bother you. Win-win.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eReads from across the room.\u003c\/strong\u003e Bold embroidery, clean spacing - designed to be legible at a glance.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eFeel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Heavyweight 100% cotton canvas\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eSize:\u003c\/strong\u003e One size 42cm x 42cm, Gusset width 9.5cm, Strap length 72cm\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eArt:\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed and machine-embroidered in our Wellington studio, made to order for introverts nationwide\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBase:\u003c\/strong\u003e AS Colour Carrie Tote\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Cold gentle wash inside-out, line dry\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFAQ\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the text readable from a distance?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes - designed at a size that reads from across a café or queue, not just up close.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I gift this to someone who's not an introvert?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf they're a dog person with a sense of humour, absolutely. The message lands either way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes it fit a laptop?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes - up to 15 with room for a notebook and water bottle.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdetails open=\"\"\u003e\n\u003csummary style=\"cursor: pointer; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 0; border-top: 1px solid #e0e0e0; list-style: none;\"\u003e✦ Embroidery \u0026amp; Shipping\u003c\/summary\u003e\n\u003cdiv style=\"padding: 10px 0 10px 0;\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDesigned and embroidered to order in Wellington, New Zealand. Please allow 7 - 10 \u003cstrong\u003ebusiness days\u003c\/strong\u003e for processing before your order is handed to the courier (longer during busy periods - see the announcement bar on our homepage).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWe ship \u003cstrong\u003eNZ-wide\u003c\/strong\u003e with tracking. We cannot deliver to PO Boxes. Rural (RD) deliveries may take an extra 1–2 business days after dispatch.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAustralia:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 5–10 working days via NZ Post International Tracked. AUD $20\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFull policy: \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/threadstories.co.nz\/policies\/shipping-policy\"\u003eShipping policy – Thread Stories\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/details\u003e\n\u003cdetails\u003e\n\u003csummary style=\"cursor: pointer; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 0; border-top: 1px solid #e0e0e0; list-style: none;\"\u003e✦ Terms \u0026amp; Returns\u003c\/summary\u003e\n\u003cdiv style=\"padding: 10px 0 10px 0;\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEmbroidered to order in Wellington. You may request a return within \u003cstrong\u003e14 days\u003c\/strong\u003e of delivery if the item is unworn and unwashed. Return shipping is paid by the customer.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFaulty or incorrect items: contact \u003cstrong\u003e\u003ca href=\"mailto:info@threadstories.co.nz\"\u003einfo@threadstories.co.nz\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e with photos.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFull policy: \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/threadstories.co.nz\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003eRefund policy – Thread Stories\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/details\u003e","brand":"Thread Stories","offers":[{"title":"Navy","offer_id":43769495617602,"sku":null,"price":40.0,"currency_code":"NZD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink","offer_id":43769495650370,"sku":null,"price":40.0,"currency_code":"NZD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0666\/4876\/8578\/files\/dog4.jpg?v=1776414121","url":"https:\/\/threadstories.co.nz\/products\/im-only-talking-to-my-dog-today-tote","provider":"Thread Stories","version":"1.0","type":"link"}